Riding the Waves of Change
Hello everyone! How you be?
It’s been a while since I have shared anything. I don’t know about you, but lots of big changes have been occurring in my life. And while the majority of these changes are good, that doesn’t mean they’re not also big, scary, and totally overwhelming! So among the many other things we’re learning to navigate these days, we’re also learning to ride the waves of change. What does that mean?
I think by now we can all agree that any degree of control we thought we had is thoroughly gone. By control, I mean the insane thought that we have any control over the actions of other people, the outside events around us, or our external world. This pandemic has shown me all the insane ways I tried to control everything around me, and the even more insane thought - I believed I was successful in the controlling!
The more changes that got thrown at me, the less successful I was at controlling each of them. Do you know what I’m talking about? It felt like trying to keep the lid on a pot of boiling water that is about to explode. Now try doing that with 10 pots! I was exhausted, running myself ragged, and wasting all of my energy on a task that I would never succeed at anyway. The worst part was that as a result of this “control,” I was keeping my life small.
But as we all know with 2020, the changes just kept coming. It became impossible to keep track of them all and try to maintain them. I’m not just talking about changes in my life, which were many. I’m also talking about huge, global and economic changes. The way in which we attempt to control the things around us looks different for everyone. Maybe you think if you just think enough positive thoughts, the outcome will change. Some people become obsessive about their homes, making sure everything is exactly in its place and if it's not, they explode. It’s not really the objects in their home that they’re worried about - it’s all the emotions they’re keeping repressed underneath that are truly bothering them.
So eventually - I gave up! Now I know in most situations “giving up” is a bad thing, and perhaps it’s not the right phrasing here. What I really did was let go.
Imagine you’re in a hurricane (deep breaths - you’re okay!). Now imagine that you’re desperately holding onto a tree for dear life. You’re not in a terribly safe position. The tree could uproot at any point, there are large objects such as cars and houses flying by you in all directions, and the water is steadily rising up your feet. Now imagine that there is a calming voice in your ear that tells you everything is going to be okay, you will be taken care of, but you have to let go. You have to trust that something is better on the other side of that tree.
If you’re not into the whole “calming voice of the universe” thing, you can also imagine a firefighter standing across the street in an all terrain vehicle telling you there is literally something better on the other side of that tree. He is desperately trying to convince you that if you just let go, there are other firefighters and EMTs waiting to catch you, wrap you in a warm blanket, and take you to the emergency shelter that isn’t flooding on the other side of town.
But you have to let go.
What will you choose?
This is the equivalent of learning to ride the waves of change.
You have to trust that there is something better for you already on its way - and you also have to trust enough to let go of all the garbage you’re holding onto to make you feel secure! The garbage is not going to save you. The amazing and generous relief workers, however, want you to be safe.
What will you choose?
The choice is yours, but all I can say is letting go was one of the best things I ever did. I feel so much freer. I have been able to take better care of myself, relax a little, and new possibilities are constantly flowing my way. But I could not control this process, and I definitely had to get through the part where I felt like I was flailing through the wind. I felt alone and scared - but I knew better things were on the other side.
And they are for you too! Plus you don’t have to do it alone - you have me :) Now that the flailing is over (fow now), rest assured you will be hearing from me more often again. I am so grateful to all of you and I feel so lucky to have you all on this journey with me!